We Wish You – Nothing!

Santa weighs inYes, I know it’s only November, but I thought it would good to get a jump on the whole “Merry Christmas” controversy that rears its bearded white head every winter.

Opinion columns and letters-to-the-editor of local newspapers will soon be replete with commentary by disheartened Christians, lamenting that public displays of “Christmas Cheer” are no longer politically correct. They will cite examples of schools not being allowed to exhibit Christmas banners or businesses prohibiting their clerks from offering Christmas greetings to their customers.

Wishing anyone and everyone a “Merry Christmas” is their birthright, they believe, and – dagnabit — no one’s gonna stop ‘em.

As a Jewish-American, I am slightly more-than-amused when a stranger greets me with “Merry Christmas,” and only slightly less-than-amused when someone who positively knows I’m Jewish wishes me a “Happy-Not-My-Holiday” — but even then, I just laugh it off.

What troubles me more is the significance behind all that wishing. It reflects a real-world naiveté — dare I say ignorance — to assume that everyone is a fellow Christian, or worse — that the United States is a Christian nation and that “Merry Christmas” is a universal American greeting. We are not and it is not.

Greeting everyone you meet with “Merry Christmas” makes as much sense as greeting everyone you meet with “Happy Birthday.”

To a non-Christian, you could just as soon wish a “Pleasant Hat Day,” as it would have the same impact.

As Americans, of course, we may choose to wish whatever to whomever. Even brainless speech is protected by the Constitution.

There are those folks who reply, “But, we don’t mind if you wish us a ‘Happy Hanukkah,’” as if their acceptance of this greeting exemplifies their tolerance and understanding of the Jewish experience.

I have no desire to greet anyone with “Happy Hanukkah” — or “Happy Pesach” or “Good Yontif” — unless they’re Jewish.

Moreover, most in the gentile world haven’t even a clue as to what Hanukkah is about (someone actually asked me once if it celebrated the “birth of our savior.”)  Yet despite widepsread ingorance of the Maccabean Revolt in 168 BCE — which arguably paved the road for the religious freedoms we enjoy today —  the rest of us are force-fed the story of Jesus everywhere we look. Non-Christians are subjugated to annual Nativity scenes, daily proselytizing and a national Christmas tree.

To gripe about losing Christmas to political correctness is disingenuous.

I have no problem with Christmas. I enjoy sharing in my friends’ celebration of their holiday and look forward to attending parties where the kissing of strangers is encouraged.

When December rolls around, if I know for certain that someone celebrates Christmas, I will wish them a merry one — and if it happens to be the anniversary of the day they purchased their lovely fedora, I will offer up a “Pleasant Hat Day,” as well.

So go ahead, offer a hearty “Merry Christmas” to everyone you meet. It’s your right – your constitutionally protected freedom of expression – to do so.

But don’t be surprised if some of us respond by exercising our consitutionally protected freedom to roll our eyes and sigh.

In case anyone asks,

Braddon